


A Path to the Door

by obi_ki



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Canon Compliant, Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Lifebonds, M/M, Memories, apparitions - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-10-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:41:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26663095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/obi_ki/pseuds/obi_ki
Summary: A series of seemingly unconnected events lead Obi-Wan down a fulfilling path.
Relationships: Qui-Gon Jinn/Obi-Wan Kenobi
Comments: 8
Kudos: 24
Collections: Backwards QuiObi Bang





	A Path to the Door

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Q111](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Q111/gifts).



> This was written for the Backwards QuiObi kink Bang and was inspired by the gorgeous art done by the fabulous Q1 that is inserted into the story. Her art was the inspiration for this fic and would not have been written without it. Thank you Q1 for allowing me to use your art and for working with me to insure it does it justice. Everything Star Wars belongs to George and the House of Mouse. I am just borrowing for a bit. Thanks to Lady DisDayne for the beta.

Letting his pack fall to the floor as he entered his quarters, Obi-Wan Kenobi stood for a minute just looking around the common room. It had been many cycles since he had crossed the threshold into these rooms and even longer since he had spent more than one night in them. He, sometimes in the company of his former padawan, Anakin Skywalker, had gone from mission to mission, war-torn world to war-torn world, until on most days he couldn't remember where he was when he woke. Amid that long string of missions, there had been an unscheduled detour to Mortis, where Obi-Wan's life has been turned upside down once again.

Obi-Wan's thoughts were in turmoil as he toed off his boots, tossed his filthy cloak over the back of a chair and started a slow circuit around the room. He let the ambiance of home soak into him, the familiar aura calmed his heart and allowed his thoughts to settle a bit. He stopped in front of the high bookcase that held his few treasured possessions and ran his fingertips through the layer of dust that coated the dark wood. So many of the major events of his life were marked by the eclectic group of items arranged on the shelves. 

Only two treasured items were missing from the display and that was because those two items were carried on Obi-Wan's person. His fingers went unconsciously to the small pouch on his belt that held his most cherished possessions. A thin braid of hair that Obi-Wan had woven while he had prepared Qui-Gon's body for the pyre, wrapped carefully in a small square of dramassian silk cut from the bottom of Qui-Gon's sleep robe. And a small black rock, the river stone from Qui-Gon's home planet that he had given to Obi-Wan for his thirteenth name day. 

The last memento that he had of his beloved master and the first. These items were never far from Obi-Wan's person. Even during his various undercover missions over the years, he had found a way to conceal them in his clothing, even on missions where his lightsaber had been left behind. 

Obi-Wan drew his attention back to the items stored in the bookcase and focused on the item cradled in a silk-covered tray resting in the center of the middle shelf, Qui-Gon's lightsaber. After he had constructed a replacement for the one he had lost to the melting pit on Naboo, Obi-Wan had removed his master's 'saber from his belt and placed it in this position of honor. Crafted as Jedi tradition dictated, by his own hand, it represented everything that Qui-Gon was - his beliefs, his strength, his compassion - and when times were darkest, both he and Anakin would gravitate to it for comfort and inspiration.

Although Obi-Wan knew that the lightsaber would be his focal point when he felt settled enough to meditate, for now he bypassed it and focused his gaze on the other items on the shelves. 

An agrinium rostrum stood to the right of the lightsaber, three braided locks of hair hanging from its ornate hooks. All three braids were about six inches long, adorned with beads and ties that denoted the individual's accomplishments. The first was a dark chestnut, half of the braided length that former Jedi Master Dooku has cut from Qui-Gon's head at his knighting ceremony. The braid had been found among Dooku's things when he had left the order, and after Qui-Gon's death, Master Yoda had generously cut it in half so that they could each keep a section. The second was reddish-gold and was half of Obi-Wan's own padawan braid. The other section had been placed in Qui-Gon hands and burned on the pyre along with his master's body. The third was a darkish blonde, the bottom section of Anakin's padawan braid. Anakin had requested to keep the top half and Obi-Wan was relatively certain that the lock of hair had been placed in Padme Naberrie's hands just hours after Anakin's knighting ceremony had concluded. 

A dark wood box, with the Jedi symbol inlaid into the lid in lighter wood, sat to the left of Qui-Gon's lightsaber. Lifting the top, Obi-Wan examined the box's contents. A blue and green braided hair tie that Obi-Wan had given to Qui-Gon for his name day, a set of blue and green ear studs that they had worn on an undercover mission and three complete sets of padawan beads, one set belonging to each of them, lined the bottom of the box. Resting atop the other items, were three scrolls. The first two contained the written copies of their master/apprentice vows, one belonging to he and Qui-Gon and one belonging to he and Anakin. The third contained the written vows from his bonding ceremony with Qui-Gon and it was that one that called to him. He unrolled the vellum and, as he silently read the words imprinted there in Qui-Gon's compact script, he could easily imagine the lilt of Qui-Gon's brogue speaking the words. 

_I, Qui-Gon Jinn, bind myself to Obi-Wan Kenobi, in all ways and for all time. Obi-Wan, you hold my heart and fill my heart with love. You are the light that leads my way. I will love, honor and cherish you all the days of my life and into the eternity of the Force._

Reading the words sent Obi-Wan's mind careening back to the cave on Mortis and his initial interaction with his blue-tinged former master. Shocked by Qui-Gon's apparition and the sound of his voice, he had just stared as his name echoed through the cave. "Obi-Wan. Have you done as I asked? Have you trained the boy?"

"Master Qui-Gon, how are you here?" he replied, unable to believe what he was seeing and hearing.

Qui-Gon had been his calm and serene self, replying as if the answer should have been something Obi-Wan had known instinctively. "I am here because you are here."

It had been said so matter of factly that Obi-Wan faltered again as he replayed the memory. Could Qui-Gon have meant what he hoped he had meant? Had Qui-Gon been watching over he and Anakin, since the day that he had left the mortal plain and moved into the Force? And if that was the case, why hadn’t Obi-Wan sensed him before Mortis? Qui-Gon's Force aura was as familiar to Obi-Wan as his own or Anakin’s. If Qui-Gon had been present, cohesive in the eddies of the Force, why had he not been able to sense his presence?

Moving away from the bookcase, Obi-Wan sat on the couch, his fingertips gently tracing the script on the scroll he still held. His sense of Qui-Gon had been so clear on Mortis, as strong and vibrant as when he had stood beside Obi-Wan in this very room. Could it have all been an illusion? A trick of the beings who held sway over Mortis, and in many ways, over the Force?

Obi-Wan focused on the interaction between them, using his Jedi recollection skills to recall the encounter in detail. Obi-Wan had been pacing the cave on Mortis, the danger facing Anakin superseding any other thoughts. Looking up and seeing the blue-tinged form of his master had shocked him into immobility. It had taken him a few seconds to find his voice and even as they exchanged conversation the feeling of incredulity never left him. He drank in the sight of the man he had spent the last twelve years grieving, and let the deep brogue of Qui-Gon's voice suffuse him. 

Obi-Wan concentrated on the feelings that had risen up in him as Qui-Gon had spoken. Comfort and security had been the most prevalent, with those being the two feelings that had been missing from his life for so long. As he focused on the memory, the sense of rightness that had accompanied Qui-Gon's presence washed over him again. A fissure of shock went through him. Was the feeling just because he was focusing on the memory or was there something more?

Rising from the sofa with a heaving sigh, Obi-Wan decided that a shower, clean clothing and some food were in order before he made any attempt at unravelling this puzzle. He retrieved his cloak from where he had tossed it, grabbed his pack and headed into his bedroom. Only his lightsaber, belt and boots were set aside, the rest of his clothing tossed down the laundry chute. The items from his travel bag soon followed, through he doubted many of those items would even be salvageable. Not even his mission toiletry kit was worth saving, so it was thrown in the trash bin inside the refresher.

After a pit stop to relive himself, Obi-Wan turned on the shower as hot as he could stand it and stepped under the spray. He stood motionless for long minutes, letting the heat seep into muscles that had been overworked for cycles on end. He forced any intruding thoughts from his mind, focusing on nothing but the feel of the water flowing over his skin and the sound of the spray bouncing off the tile walls. The sonic showers on the Negotiator were adequate to remove dirt but did nothing to help ailing muscles or ailing minds. And on the battlefield, a splash of water from a canteen did nothing to remove accumulated grime and grit.

But even in the Jedi Temple hot water was not limitless, so when he felt the water starting to cool, Obi-Wan drew out of his stupor and grabbed the soap. It took multiple passes to really get his body and hair clean, but he was relieved the water was only tepid instead of frigid by the time he had completed the task. He took pleasure in having a towel large and downy enough to actually fully dry his hair and skin. He took a moment to clean his teeth and then used the towel to wipe the steam off the mirror so he could shave. It took longer than normal as his beard had become rather scruffy, but the sight of his face sporting a trimmed beard and clean skin reflected in the mirror made it worth the time.

With no intention to leave his quarters tonight, Obi-Wan settled for a pair of very worn leggings and long-sleeved inner tunic when he dressed. He headed back to the common area, putting on the kettle and searching the freezer unit for something edible. He was relieved to find a container of nerf stew and a plasteen bag with some challa bread that he had tossed in there at some point in the past. Both would reheat quickly in the nanowave stove, and by the time his kettle whistled and he was pouring the water over the tea leaves to steep, his food was ready. 

After many months of living off bland shipboard rations or even less palatable field ration bars, eating something that actually had flavor was a treat. Obi-Wan ate every bit of the stew, using his bread to wipe any remnants of the gravy from his plate. He refilled his teacup twice more, the steam from the cup soothing his sinuses as readily as the fragrant liquid soothed his throat. He set a second pot to steep on the warmer, cleaned his dishes and headed back to the bookcase.

This time, Obi-Wan removed Qui-Gon’s lightsaber from its place of honor. Cradling it reverently in his hands, he detoured back to his bedroom to get his belt-pouch before placing his mediation mat in front of the bookcase holding the rest of his treasures. He settled on the mat in a lotus position and removed the river stone and braid of hair from the pouch. He wrapped the braid around the hilt of Qui-Gon’s lightsaber before clasping it in his left hand and then enclosed the stone within his right. 

Focusing on the items he held, Obi-Wan closed his eyes, slowed his breathing and dropped into a meditative trance. He began by again focusing on the encounter on Mortis. He allowed his mind to drift, letting the Force direct his thoughts and permitting those to just flow through him. It was as if he was watching a flickering holovid, as a variety of moments replayed within his mind. He let them proceed at will, knowing that once he surfaced from meditation, he could examine them more closely. Images from an array of missions became intertwined with the images from Mortis, scenes from Sullust, Toydaria, and Lola Sayu, and with them, a number of the people involved in those events appearing chaotically throughout. He struggled to let it flow as the Force directed, repeatedly feeling as if one image or another might help him solve this puzzle. 

When Obi-Wan finally surfaced from his meditation, the early evening sky had morphed into the dark sky of full night. Although the abundance of occupants on Coruscant meant the planet never achieved full darkness, the main traffic lanes were not visible from his quarters so the view from his windows were darker than most. He sometimes lost his sense of time passing while meditating but not normally to this extent. A glance at the chrono told him he’d been meditating for almost four hours, and the stiffness in his body as he shifted supported that fact. 

After placing the items he still held carefully on the floor, Obi-Wan rose from his meditation mat. After a quick trip to the refresher and then to the kitchen for water, he returned to the common room, tossed a throw pillow to the floor and moved his mat closer to the wall. Propping the pillow against the wall, he sat down and leaned against it in a more comfortable position. Picking up Qui-Gon’s saber, he focused his Force sense through their dormant lifebond and reached through it for the kyber crystal. 

The kyber reacted to Obi-Wan’s probe instantly, a warm throb of welcome flooding him through the Force. A tiny pulse of green shot through the bond, a momentary light before it shifted back to the dull gray. He almost dropped the saber in shock. The last time he had felt anything though this bond, it had been the wash of love sent to him as Qui-Gon lay dying in his arms. 

Obi-Wan examined the bond extensively after his surprise dissipated, hoping beyond hope that he had not imagined what he felt. The spark he had sensed was gone but there seemed to be something hidden beneath the grayness overlaying the bond. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had the opportunity to meditate with Qui-Gon’s lightsaber, but he had no doubt it had been at least a year, maybe more, since he’d been back on Coruscant for more than a day or two. Could something have changed within the bond even before his sojourn to Mortis?

Setting that thought aside for now, Obi-Wan focused on the words they had exchanged in the cave. After Qui-Gon had announced that he was there for Obi-Wan, it had taken his mind long moments to absorb what he was seeing and hearing. Finally, he was composed enough that he had asked, “I don’t understand. What is this place?”

“Unlike any other. A conduit through which the entire Force of the universe flows,” Qui-Gon had replied calmly. 

Focusing intently on that image and the emotions surrounding it, Obi-Wan now believed that the Force aura emanating from the apparition was truly Qui-Gon. Even the choice of words used when the man had answered Obi-Wan’s question rang true to the cadence of his master’s natural speech. At the time, he had convinced himself that Qui-Gon’s appearance was a darkside trick. Even when he had delivered his report to the Council from the communication center of the Negotiator, he had downplayed even the possibility of authenticity, instead conveying his belief that all the visions they had experienced on Mortis were fabricated by the Father. Examining the memories again now, he found that it was not only the Force aura running through them that rang true, it was also the sense of rightness that had accompanied that encounter.

Looking past the encounter on Mortis for now, Obi-Wan reviewed the other images that he’s seen during his meditation. Some of them had flickered through his mind so quickly that he wasn’t certain what they represented, especially the ones that occurred on the battlefield. Others had been easier to identify, so he decided to examine those more thoroughly in chronological order to see if he could find a pattern.

The first identifiable image had been of him and Anakin fighting Asajj Ventress in the hangar of the Confederacy command ship, Providence, over Sullust. Ventress had shot down Obi-Wan’s fighter and had forced him to land on her command ship. Anakin had followed up by shooting Ventress down and then had joined them in the hangar. The three of them had dueled until Dooku’s forces had turned on Asajj and bombed the command ship in an attempt to kill her and them. He and Anakin had stolen a fighter from the hangar and escaped back to the Negotiator.

Obi-Wan continued to scrutinize the memory, limiting his focus to from the point before his fighter was hit until they had settled back onto the hangar deck of the Negotiator. He slowed the images in his mind, looking at everything he’d seen, heard and felt during the incident. The memories all seemed rather matter of fact, things that happened frequently in almost every battle scenario. He had almost given up hope that he would find anything unusual when he felt it, the slight jerk of a Force push against his fighter seconds after Asajj had shot out his engines. He examined it again, opening his senses even more, but could not find any trace that the push had come from Anakin or Ventress. Probing even more intently, the actual push was obvious but the aura initiating it seemed to come from nowhere and everywhere.

The next images were related to the mission on Toydaria. Obi-Wan and Anakin had been sent to Toydaria to negotiate with King Katuunko, but those negotiations had failed to take place when Count Dooku’s new apprentice, Savage Opress, had murdered the King in a rage. They had dueled against him while still on the planet before chasing him back to Dooku’s Dreadnaught. As they had arrived on the cruise, they had interrupted a duel between Dooku, Ventress and Opress. He and Anakin had engaged Savage as Ventress had chased after Dooku. In the end, Opress had escaped and they had fled from the dreadnaught back to the fleet.

Using the same process as he had the first time, Obi-Wan scrutinized the images and the corresponding memories. He could sense nothing out of the ordinary looking at the events on Toydaria, but the situation had been pretty standard for them. Their landing on the Dreadnaught had been lightly contested by the hangar droids, but by now dealing with droids was like swatting bugs. He slowed his appraisal of the events as they came to the ongoing fight, watching in confusion as Dooku battled against his apprentices. He stopped at the moment that Dooku became aware of their presence, the quick glance over at them followed by a longer look directly behind them. Whatever had distracted Dooku had spooked him because, in the next moment, he pelted down the corridor with Ventress right behind him and Opress turning back towards Obi-Wan and Anakin. 

Obi-Wan expanded his senses, slipping into the threads of the Force webbing around the fight. The majority of the tendrils were heavily tainted by the Dark, but one small wisp was exuding Light and seemed to be directed towards him. Like the push against his fighter, the source of the aura surrounding the tendril could not be discerned. 

The rescue mission to the Citadel on Lola Sayu had been a nightmare from the start. They’d gone to rescue Master Even Piell, Captain Wilhuff Tarkin and his crew who had been captured by the Separatists after discovering intel on a secret hyperspace route. Obi-Wan had assembled a strike team for the covert mission. As often happened with missions with he and Anakin undertook, they had to continually improvise, but examining the memories he found nothing in the deeper scrutiny that was at odds with the information he’d presented to Yoda and Mace when they had met the team on the Temple landing platform.

Thinking about that informal meeting nudged something in Obi-Wan’s memory so he shifted his attention to that. Tarkin’s refusal to meet with Master Yoda to relay his half of the information had taken all of them by surprise. Tarkin explained he’d been instructed by Chancellor Palpatine to bring the information directly to him without sharing it with the Jedi. Examining the moment in hindsight, it made no sense. Palpatine was no tactician. This information was only valuable to the Republic Navy so why wouldn’t he want it to go to the Jedi who were his tactical specialists. He reviewed the memory a few more times before he finally found another Force wisp. This tendril was directed at Tarkin as if to put him in a spotlight. Like the others, it was strong with the Light but its source was undistinguishable in any way. 

Absently turning the hilt of Qui-Gon’s lightsaber in his hands, Obi-Wan sought to find some connection amid the seemingly random events. Connecting again with the kyber, he focused on the three moments when he had sensed the unusual tendrils of the Force. All three had corresponded to a pivotal moment in those missions, a moment where a different result could have completely altered the conclusion of the events.

As he deepened his focus, Obi-Wan felt as kyber in his hands extend along their dormant bond. As the two connected, he could almost feel the determination behind the tendrils of the Force in the memories. He was so accustomed to the input of the Force around him in the heat of battle, that trust took over and he just followed the nudges without any deeper thought. But now, examining the moments with nothing else to divert his attention, he could feel the import of those nudges. It was as if the Force had been directing a light onto those precise moments, to bring their importance into the spotlight.

Suddenly, a pattern emerged from Obi-Wan’s examination. Normally the Force gave warnings of danger, hinted at the proper path, or exposed something hidden. But in two of these cases, the Force had interceded to insure his and Anakin’s safety, and in the third, to accentuate an action that held greater consequence than appeared on the surface.

As that revelation solidified, Obi-Wan also became aware of something more, a trace of familiar emotion buried within the waves of the Force at those particular moments. His grasp on Qui-Gon’s lightsaber tightened as his heart leapt at the possibility. Could these pushes have come from Qui-Gon?

Before Mortis, Obi-Wan would have dismissed the idea as wishful thinking. But now, while his mind may have still been vacillating, his heart was all in. His hours of mediation had clarified one very important fact for him. Although the Father had led them to Mortis and maneuvered most of things that happened there, Qui-Gon’s appearance had not been one of them. 

Qui-Gon had explained that Mortis was a nexus of the Force and that was how he had been able to reach out. But Obi-Wan’s study of both Old Republic and Ancient Je’dai history, confirmed that there were a number of Force nexuses throughout the Galaxy and one of the most powerful was the mountain on which the Jedi Temple on Coruscant had been built. 

Although the active levels of the current Temple were located in the upper strata of Coruscant’s ecumenopolis, the foundation of the Temple stood on a mountaintop close to 3000 levels below the Temple spires. Traveling down a few hundred levels was a challenge most padawans considered a right of passage and some of the more ambitious ones, Obi-Wan included, had navigated dark and dusty routes down almost a thousand. Old equipment and outdated technology were stored in a few of the levels below the occupied ones, but most just sat vacant. 

When he’d been raised to the rank of Councilor, Obi-Wan had been shocked to find out that the Nexus under the Temple was still accessible. Even as the Temple citadel had grown and expanded over the millennia, the route leading to the Nexus had been painstakingly maintained. Only members of the Council, the head of the Temple Guards and the head Archivist had access to the codes needed to unlock the multiple security doors that had been constructed along the route. When he had learned of it, Obi-Wan had planned an excursion to the revered site but the demands of war had kept him from making the journey. 

Taking a few deep breaths to calm his now racing heart, Obi-Wan looked at the chrono. There were still six hours until dawn and another three until he was due in the Council Chambers for today’s session. Knowing that he would be returning to the Negotiator immediately after the meeting, he decided that it was now or possibly never.

Rising from the floor, Obi-Wan returned Qui-Gon’s lightsaber to its place of honor and headed to his bedroom. He dressed in his Jedi tunics, even going so far as to put on his chestplate and gauntlets before buckling on his belt. He returned to the common room to gather up his river stone and Qui-Gon’s braid, placed them in the silk pouch and reattached it to his belt. He grabbed a couple of glow sticks from the drawer and tucked them into the leather pouch hanging beside his saber. 

He pulled out his comm unit, called down to stores to requisition a few items and have them delivered to the ship. He recorded a time-delayed message to Mace, that would transmit automatically at 0900 hours unless he cancelled it. ‘Mace, I am tending to a very important issue. I will be there as soon as possible. OWK.’ This would cover him if his excursion took longer than expected. 

He grabbed a ration bar, a couple of water bulbs, pulled a clean robe from his closet and put it on. With a fond backward glance at his quarters, Obi-Wan walked out the door. Pulling up his hood, he headed towards the lift, the late hour making the hallway empty. He rode the lift down as far as it would go, before exiting and heading towards the meditation gardens. He made it to the second lift without seeing anyone and repeated his actions. This time he headed towards the central spire and entered a third lift. This one required his councilor’s code to activate and would be the last he could take before changing to stairways. 

Obi-Wan exited the lift and looked around in wonder. Amid the dust and cobwebs, the architecture of the level was still evident. Detailed frescos adorned the walls, scenes from battles of the Jedi-Sith Wars were clearly recognizable in spite of cracks and missing pieces. As he continued down the hallway, broken statues and cracked busts appeared along the way, all unrecognizable except for the fact that they were Jedi Masters. When he reached the first locked door, he drew in a calming breath as he entered the code.

A trail of safety lights glowed weakly on the walls but Obi-Wan was glad he had the foresight to bring glow rods with him. Lighting one, he made his way carefully down the stairs. The stairs were set in a similar style as the great stairway that stood above them, although they were much narrower and not as ornate. He had traversed over one hundred stairs before they ended in another open area. This one also had frescos and statues decorating it, but these were less stylized and more damaged. The only one he actually recognized was a depiction of the Mandalorian Jedi Master Tarre Vizsla, holding the Darksaber aloft.

Obi-Wan soon came to another locked door, opening it with the second code. Again, the safety lights provided some illumination but the glow rod provided more. The construction of this stairway was obviously older and the places that had been repaired over the years stood out. 

The open area at the end of this staircase was smaller and in a much plainer construction that the others. The piles of debris and rough reinforcement beams told Obi-Wan that he was now standing in the ruins of Sith Shrine the original Temple had been built on. The final door now stood before him and his hand shook as he entered the final code. This stairway was shorter than the others and a hint of light coming up told him that he was almost at the bottom. The back of his legs were beginning to ache and a part of his mind protested the fact that his journey back up would be even more taxing. 

The power of the Force emanating from below both welcomed and awed him. As he stepped onto the age-smoothed rocks of the mountaintop, Obi-Wan dropped to his knees and opened himself fully to the Force surrounding him. It sang in a beautiful melody of intertwined strands of the Living and Unifying Force, blue, green, yellow, purple and white wisps that were visible behind his closed eyes. In all his years with the Jedi, he had never felt closer to the Force and he wondered if Qui-Gon had ever had the opportunity to experience it.

“I did, once,” echoed through the room and Obi-Wan looked up to see the specter of his master standing before him.

“Qui-Gon,” he whispered, both thrilled and surprised that this trek has been successful. He stood slowly, his cloak dropping from his shoulders, as he drank in the sight of the man he loved. Except for the blue glow, he looked exactly as he did in Obi-Wan’s memories. The soft gaze in his eyes, the crinkles in the corners, the trimmed beard and the silver-streaked hair, tied back and flowing over his shoulders exactly as it had been in life. 

“I knew you would figure it out,” Qui-Gon declared as he met Obi-Wan’s gaze. 

“You could have made the path a little easier, Master,” Obi-Wan replied, falling into light teasing as if it had never stopped. 

“Imp. I did what I could. As in all things, there is a learning curve,” Qui-Gon retorted in the same tone.

Obi-Wan took a step forward, reaching out towards the glowing form. “I have missed you, my Master,” he said, stopping his fingers just shy of the specter.

“As I have missed you, my own,” Qui-Gon replied.

A wave of love flowed over him and Obi-Wan felt their bond brighten and strengthen in his mind. As he watched the man before him, his form seemed to solidify, the shadow of the rock behind Qui-Gon fading as he lost some of his translucence. With not a little trepidation, he placed his fingertips against one large hand and was shocked to find it solid. “How?”

The smile that emerged on Qui-Gon’s face was achingly familiar. “Have you forgotten all your lessons so soon, my Padawan? All things are possible within the Force.” After a moment, he added a real explanation. “The Living Force is so much stronger here than it was in the cave on Mortis, so I imagine that is why I am able to appear more solid.”

The lilt of that familiar brogue broke his stupor and Obi-Wan pressed himself against Qui-Gon. A tear dripped down his cheek as his fingers twinned into silken hair and his thumb traced along the line between his lover’s cheek and beard. The weight of a large hand against the back of his head pressed Obi-Wan closer, and he collapsed against the beloved body. 

When he looked up, Obi-Wan found his master looking at him rather smugly. “What?”

“I was just wondering what happened to my rule-abiding padawan. A journey to the Nexus without the Council’s knowledge seems more like something I would have done,” Qui-Gon chided. “At least when my master brought me here, it was with Council knowledge, if not quite Council approval.”

“Dooku brought you here. When?” Obi-Wan asked, in disbelief. That kind gesture seemed so out of character with the man Dooku was now.

“The night before my Trials. He was a stern and inscrutable man, but he did have his moments of kindness,” Qui-Gon admitted. “His position on the Council allowed his access and from what he told me that night, he had come here a number of times to meditate and explore his connection to the Force.”

Pushing Dooku from his mind, Obi-Wan asked the question that had haunted him from the moment his master had vanished on Mortis. “Have you been watching over us since Naboo?”

“No,” Qui-Gon admitted as he continued to hold Obi-Wan against him. “At first, it took all my energy just to remain cohesive and test the waters, so to speak. Later, I met other Force entities who inhabited the area between and learned how to observe what was occurring in the real world. But time passes differently in the Force, and each excursion to the barrier of the veil would deplete me. By the time I had been restored enough to attempt it again, great swaths of time had passed.”

That admission saddened Obi-Wan, who had hoped that Qui-Gon had been aware immediately, but he thrusted that aside. “How long?”

“I think it was about three years in real time,” Qui-Gon explained. “You and Anakin were on Zonama Sekot, and something about the planet allowed me to extend further than I had before.”

Obi-Wan’s face fell at the revelation and another tear dripped down his cheek. “Anakin told me he thought he heard you but I dismissed it as a child’s fantasy.” He tried to hide his pain that Qui-Gon had reached out to Anakin instead of him but he was immediately seen through.

“You were still too mired in grief to be open to my presence,” Qui-Gon stated. 

“You tried?” Obi-Wan asked.

“Of course, I tried, beloved, many times,” Qui-Gon declared, hurt evident in his tone. “You have always been the most important person in my life. Why wouldn’t I reach out to you if I had the opportunity.” 

That declaration brought Obi-Wan back to what had been revealed during his mediation. “On Sullust, how were you able to impact the Force in the real world?”

“With great difficulty,” Qui-Gon admitted with a chuckle. “I really don’t know why it worked that time when I had been unsuccessful in all my prior attempts. Desperation?” The annoyed look that Obi-Wan gave him was so familiar that Qui-Gon barked another laugh. “Okay, okay. It’s most likely the fact that there was no opposing force fighting me. All I had to do was direct you towards the hangar. You did the rest.”

A beep from Obi-Wan chrono, reminding him that the Council meeting was in an hour, surprised him. “I wish I could just stay down here, forever” he admitted, laying his head back down on Qui-Gon’s chest.

“If only,” Qui-Gon agreed. He pressed a kiss to Obi-Wan’s forehead and reached through the Force into their lifebond. 

As it had when he had first arrived at the Nexus, the bond brightened and strengthened, until it glowed almost as brilliantly as it had when Qui-Gon had lived. “Master?” Obi-Wan questioned.

“I do not know if I will ever be strong enough to appear to you without the benefit of a nexus,” Qui-Gon declared. “But I am hopeful that this augmentation of our bond will allow you to at least sense me when I reach out. If I can continue to strengthen it, it may even allow you to hear me.” 

“And for you to hear my reply?” Obi-Wan asked, eagerly.

“Most likely. I’ve been able to hear you at times already, especially when you’ve gone to the garden grotto and have been speaking to me directly,” Qui-Gon answered.

Happiness filled Obi-Wan and he raised his face to look at Qui-Gon. “Life has not been easy since Naboo and it helps to know that you have been beside us at least some of the way.” 

Qui-Gon’s form began to become more translucent and he knew he wouldn’t be able to hold his form much longer. He leaned down and covered Obi-Wan’s lips with his own. “Until we are together again. Stay safe,” he said as he pulled back. A sense of urgency overtook him as he began to fade. “Be cautious, my love. Things are not as they seem and Dooku has many unsuspected allies in this plot to upend the Republic. Trust your instincts, especially when it comes to the political arena. Trust in the Force.”

“I will, Qui-Gon. I love you. I will look ahead to a day when you can come to me again, and if not, until the day when I can come to you.” Obi-Wan watched Qui-Gon become more and more translucent until he finally disappeared completely.

Obi-Wan stood in the center of the room for a time, lost in thought, until another beep from his chrono reminded him of the pending Council meeting. Tentatively, he reached across the lifebond and was relieved to find that the new strength within it had remained even after Qui-Gon’s presence had faded. Sending a wash of love back through it, he bent down to pick up his cloak and started up the stairs.

The trek back up to the inhabited levels seemed much shorter this time, although as expected the back of his legs burned with the exertion. The anxiety and concern that had filled him earlier was replaced with a sense of support he had rarely felt since Naboo. Duty would soon find him, along with a predictable scolding from Mace for his tardiness. 

But for the first time in twelve years, Obi-Wan did not feel the pressure of his responsibilities quite so strongly. For now, he knew that Qui-Gon stood beside him, looking out for him, and for Anakin and Ashoka as well, even if they didn’t know it. The Wars still raged and the Darkness still swirled around them like a swarm of insects just waiting to attack. But the light of their bond and the memory of his lover’s kiss would provide a source of comfort that would soothe his pain and heal his heart as he fulfilled his duty, and for Obi-Wan Kenobi, nothing mattered more.


End file.
